Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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