Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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