He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
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