don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
