Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
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