We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I love you.
Bad choice
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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