she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
