I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
