batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Randomize
