Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
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