carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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