The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
