How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He passed out mid-signature
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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