Im at strip club and am horny
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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