"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I could fuck to npr.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
