Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
