I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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