cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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