That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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