he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
