I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.