let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
