Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Randomize
