there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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