Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
