It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
