talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
