Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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