My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
