He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize