Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I'm both gender and math confused
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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