so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
