I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Can vaginas get frostbite?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize