Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
