none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
