U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Just pee around me
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
