who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
