so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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