The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
