She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
BRING THE BAGELS
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
