he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
