did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize