Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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