no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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