I like my sex mixed with concussions.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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