a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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