After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
