I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not