yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize