How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
