WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize