Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize