He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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